


Knowing

by DragonLover13



Category: Naruto
Genre: Child Abuse, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Hatred, Violence, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-24
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-04-07 10:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14079240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonLover13/pseuds/DragonLover13
Summary: He always knew. Deep inside of himself, he knew what he was. Who he was. But not knowing was always easier, pretending and smiling like the worlds perfect was always easier.For him and everyone else.





	1. Just Starting

**Author's Note:**

> This was an idea I had, I know stupid. It's not canon, it'll have many differences but there will still be spoilers.

He's six when he first begins to think on it, how he doesn’t think the other kids he knows at the orphanage deal with this. The beatings, the name calling, and the whispering in the street. But he could be wrong, and he doesn’t like to judge people like they judge him. So, he keeps to himself, he tells know one. Because that would be useless. That would make him even weaker. 

It’s a month later he's out on the street after being kicked out of the orphanage. He tells himself it's for the best. That it's his fault. That he caused a ruckus and now he must pay for it.

It's three months later when Jiji finds out. His smile seems strained and unhappy.  
Naruto wishes he never did. Find out, that is.

He would live on the streets for the rest of his life if Jiji smiled just a bit more, was just a little less tense. Because he knows that Jiji has a responsibility, that he's under a lot of pressure.  
He doesn’t need anymore.

So, when he gets his own apartment, run down as it may be, and Jiji leans down; gentle hands on his shoulders and asks him in a voice filled with grief if anyone has ever hurt him. 

He smiles that stunning smile that he has learn to smile, because he can't do anything else, and tells him no.  
JJ looks relieved, he looks lighter.

And even when the guilt of lying sits heavy on his tongue and his shoulders, he feels the tiniest bit of relief too.

Learning to lie was easy enough, learning when to stop was much more trouble.

And after another beat down with the town haters who call him demon. He stumbles back to his shamble of a home, hardly a home at all, that has new and old graphite painted on his walls, he wonders why he even deals with it at all.

(He doesn’t want this anymore, so why bother)


	2. Hatred

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah another chapter! Ha...ha...ha... Please Comment :) !

He's seven when he first relieves that if he bites his lip hard enough he'll barley make a sound.

So, he continues to do that, muffling the sounds of his suffering so no one hears. 

He's eight when he first starts at the archenemy. He's not sure if he really wants to be a Ninja, not with how things have been going so far; but he doesn’t have much of a choice. When he turns to enter the school the women at the front desk stops him, she's already giving him a nasty look. Feeling isolated and more than a little scared, he turns and bolts out of the school before she so much as says demon. He isn't in the mood for a beat down. 

Later that day when he's home alone pouting, not because he can't be a ninja. No, he couldn't care less about that, he's pouting because he wasn't even given the chance. Jiji, comes and speaks to him about missing his first day at the archenemy.

As if it's his fault. 

He asks Jiji if he'll walk with him tomorrow. The man gives a strange look, as if thinking of a way to tell him no. In the end he can't find a reason. The women at the desk doesn’t dare to stop him again. 

On his first day at the academy, he meets one Sasuke Uchiha. The moment their eyes meet Naruto knows that he'll never be 'friends' with the last Uchiha.   
Not because he's a pompous jerk who takes everybody and everything for granted, not because he appears to be better at him at everything causing people to make fun of him. It's not even the fact that he always seems to be angry about something.

He doesn’t like how Sasuke doesn’t pretend to be ok like he does, that doesn’t bother him. Naruto just doesn’t understand. And that's what bothers him.   
Sasuke also glares at him. Glares at him with such hate, that makes him think that he knows. And if he knows then there is no way to hide from his demons. 

His demon 

(That's what you are.)

So, 

He doesn’t like Sasuke Uchiha.


End file.
